Note: this post does not represents the feelings of the DOD; this is my blog and these are my expressions.
Intro
I wanted to publish this post while I was in the airport, happily waiting for my luggage that was sent to the wrong plane, but I was too tired to polish the entire thing and decided to wait till now.
In my last post, I did not knew that my life was about to change. I was not planing on that day to start the whole process that would elevate my persona for good. It still remains a mystery for me how I woke up on that day thinking about some key words that were foretelling my future without me suspecting anything.
It is true that when we let go and start doing inner work, the universe starts to organize everything in your favor. Repeat after me: everything works out for my good, everything works out in my favor; EVERYTHING. This has been my mantra since I started to understand the laws that govern all existence.
How should I start...let's sing together...c'mon...
I left my home...to join the NAVY.
It all started because of a phone call that ended in 0 productivity and 0 results. The incompetency of the housing administration in Puerto Rico sent me to the roof. I believe I was led to leave my comfort zone in San Sebastián, Puerto Rico because my dad was in need of help. Things would had ended badly if I would not have come back to my home town Mayaguez.
Some things happen for a reason after all; the laws of the universe.
When I arrived and saw the messy situation I looked to the heavens and said in my insides "ok, I see..." So, I started doing my thing and we even went to court, and for self defense because at that time I was wondering if she would really act like she said, I bought a gun 9mm Masada semi automatic 13 + 17 (I am a licensed gun owner of course) because the police was not up to help us neither and this women death treated us.
Because she is a woman, she was taking advantage, so a woman came in to the scene and stood up con los cojones bien puestos.
So, like Naruto, I allowed the 9 tails inside me to take charge and my radars where working 24/7 leading to sometimes exhaustion because like a watcher, I would wake up at 1:00, 2:00, 3:00, 4:00 am to walk around my house and see that everything was in order.
As you can see, I reached to the law enforcement first as any normal and decent civilian would do. But, they rather sit and wait for somebody to get hurt to then start acting.
I was getting worried about it. Worried about the indifference and how they would take a death treat so lightly.
We supposedly had priority to move out because of the restriction order the court gave us against this woman and that never happened. We patiently waited till January- February 2026. I could not wait no more so I gave them a call. I told them how quick they are to charge people rent and ask for an infinite amount of questionable documents, but when it comes to receive good service and for them to show diligence in their negligence, the willing to do the right thing is not there.
I hung up angry and went to the beach to cry and clear my mind.
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| My first practice. Mind you that this cardboard is recycled, so, not all bullet wholes are mine. Thus, I got way better with time. John Wick is trembling! I love John Wick. |
Like a movie, I was not just dealing with this despicable woman, her marijuana and cigarettes and the negligent housing department, but with my elder brother addiction problem. He was in jail and I was the one driving from Mayaguez to Ponce on the weekends. The humiliation is real; you have to get undressed, they check you for any suspicious thing and a dog smells you. On top of that, those correctional guards does not have the best attitude. So, I told my dad " I am not coming here ever again".
Then my brother got out, I had to drive to jail at NIGHT (Mayaguez-Ponce at 6:00 pm, Ponce-Mayaguez around 9:00 pm) to pick him up, had to wait around 3 hours sitting there in a waiting area. He finally came, we told him the business, asked if he agreed, he said yes and in less than 24 hours...LESS than 24 hrs... he started to do his thing again. I almost got involved in a brothers that hate each other fight with fists and everything, and I kicked him out from my dad's home. He left doing a spectacle while my dad was crying in the living room, and I was holding my fist, and biting my tongue to do not create an even bigger spectacle for the neighbors to see.
While I was still posting on this blog "happy posts" about my new sheets, makeup, and other happy stuff, I was dealing with all of this. Because this blog is my hobby, my happy place, my creative bubble. This is why you should not envy anyone on the internet just because they are showing happy highlights of their life. Never believe that somebody is doing better than you just because it happens that I can suddenly buy something nice for myself or decide to focus on other things to ease my pain.
Uh! I spotted 1:11 at the clock while writing this! Thank you God, Universe!
And while all of that was happening I also was doing some serious inside job. Reading about the laws of the universe, life, philosophy, reading about great thinkers in history and engineering a new brain. The Bible was not enough no more. Something inside me was telling me that there was more to the universal picture and that having so much difficulty in life was not normal. Questions that I had for years finally got an intellectual response that actually made sense.
But, this is a topic for another day; but the thing is that I asked for a sign of what would be my next step to move forward and all of a sudden a sign of the NAVY was right there and I said: "I'm fucking doing it!"
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| Me at the Luis M Marin Airport leaving to Great Lakes. |
Because I was stripped off of my phone, I don't have any pictures of my recruit process. But I will be honest and say that it was not the best in some aspects. I went there with a heart full of pain, anger, resentment towards life, my brothers, etc and I was going trough the motions. Some events that took place were not helpful, while others gave me structure, discipline, and helped me to dominate and use properly my 9 tails.
Not just in cases like the one with the neighbor. That's what I wanted; to have a good relationship with my shadow (Carl Jung) and stop pretending to be somebody I am not just to please others.
In many cases, I could not respond the way I wanted because I knew the consequences and that helped me to build stamina. To resist and to have control of impulses. But hey, not everything we want is the right thing to have or to do.
Uh! Ah! I wanna kill/slap/kick somebody! Uh! Ah! I want to bury their bodies!
I know, better said that done, but it is not impossible.
It happened in me a few times, I wanted to kick some people straight in their faces, but I had a goal, and it was to be better and to create a stronger future and a stronger me.
Also, I spoke about a painful situation that nobody knows about. I finally for the first time opened that wound with the help of a chaplain and still working with it.
But best of all was the activities such as gas chambers, fire fighting, war first aid, battle stations, and other classes designed to help us to be better persons and sailors.
In boot camp I learnt how to manage my time in a even more efficient way, to train my body to wake up even more early than I ever did, I ate a sugar-snacks free diet, my face changed for the better because my pores were totally gone, I lost a massive amount of weight (went from 170 to 130), got a free butt lift and my hair was beautiful than ever.
No heat, no blower was a great reset for my hair.
When I arrived at A School in Pensacola, FL it was such a wonderful thing. Just a few undesirable attitudes, but most of them were respectful, attentive, cordial, and willing to help. I met very educated people and made a good friend from Mexico. I arrived in heaven and it showed in my mood and in my grades. I got 96, 92, 96, 92, and my final test was a 88.
I did great and I am proud of myself even though I did not got that honor student recognition. I am proud of this accomplishment of mine and let this be the first of many more 90+ in my upcoming tests when I finally get into a fleet. Also, that 88 was mysterious, I know the universe was telling me something and thing is that 88 is the number of abundance, positive changes, good luck and new beginnings.
I was part of barracks support and duty section 3. I was part of watches, did supper and chow relieves. We will clean the building and common areas because sadly, some sailors act like pigs and throw trash around the campus like if it was the right thing to do.
I also participated in beach cleaning and helped in the pet shelter. I also was part of a secret training I was told not to disclose.
Visited a Peruvian restaurant and tried ceviche for the very first time.
I let go of everything to be open and receive what God knows aligns better with my purpose. The algorithm in the universe is perfect just like Pitagoras and Tesla showed us.
I allowed myself to be vulnerable in this post because, I make my posts serve a purpose. Let the purpose of all of this to be to help you see that if I can do it, you can do it too.
Everybody is born with a light nobody can steal and with the capacity to do/create great things. Everybody has a charm and uniqueness to make it far and big. I just focused on a vision and kept moving forward. The universe help those that are helping themselves by just entering the right frequency.
If you are going trough challenging circumstances remember that you hold the key to open or close doors.
I am doing great things already.
My life can be resumed in one word: perseverance and my motor has been to do the right thing. We reap what we saw and what you give to the universe will come back to you.
That's the universal law.
Please, remember that being kind does not mean allowing others taking advantage of you. Fly away from people that only wants to absorb from you with no apologies. Protect your peace, you don't have to be friends with everybody.
Keep Moving Forward,
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